There are some coming changes with my job, our company has announced that our department will be discontinued in several months time. I seem to always get into these situations, during the internet bubble burst, I was with two companies consecutively that closed down in the end.  Perhaps I have really bad luck?! 

I am not too worried about the next steps though, as I don’t think it will be difficult for me to find similar opportunities.  Part of me actually wants this to end sooner so that I can take a long(er) vacation before deciding on the next steps.  Plus I have not been able to build good rapport with the coworkers here so I am not really enjoying the work environment.  It’s been almost a year now that I’ve worked in this office, and I haven’t been able to become part of the clique.  (It’s pretty clique-y in this office) Sure, I have lunch with them on most days but I guess I just don’t relate to many of the things they talk about, partly due to the difference in our jobs, I am not clued in on most of their daily grinds, and partly due to the difference in culture.  So, I find myself usually being the quiet one at lunch.  I am not a talkative person to begin with, combined with unfamiliar subjects, I become almost a complete listener.  Some time ago, I decided not to follow the daily lunch routine with the same group of people, and have more lunches alone which I find more enjoyable at times.  Perhaps I am being misunderstood as stand-offish because of my absence in the lunch routine, now when I join them for lunch, I find that one coworker in particular has begun to ignore me.  She was actually the one who I had a working relationship with since I was in NY, so she was the one whom I was closer to when I first came here.  I did ask if I am being too sensitive because she is the type of person whose demeanor can be seen as abrupt and cold at times but can actually be very friendly.  But after multiple encounters, I am getting the intuitive feeling that there is something wrong.  I am pretty clueless on why she is being this way, and I have tried to strike up conversations when I see her at lunch, but she either ignores me or replies curtly and then proceeds to joke around and have conversations with other people at the table.  Perhaps she thinks I am a really boring person? That I don’t have anything in common with her?  Who knows?  This is the first time I’ve encountered someone like this at work, I’ve always been able to have friendly relationships with people I work with, and so it bothers me. 

I don’t want to talk to her about this, however.  I am not good at confrontations, and I am pretty sure what her response will be.  I just need to remind myself that there is nothing wrong with me, that there are still others who appreciate me.  Right?